User blog:Gerald-XR-Donovan/Citadel Script
(Connie is in a forest, surrounded by zombies) Connie: Shit! (A zombie grabs her but she stabs it. It falls to the ground.) Connie: How many of these things are there? (The zombies are getting closer when a few of them are shot dead by a man.) ???: Come on! This way! (Connie follows the man for ten minutes to a hill, on the way they talk) Connie: Shit, you saved my life back there. ???: Yeah. That... wasn't a good situation. I'm Elliot. Who are you? Connie: Connie. Where are you taking me? Elliot: Back to my group. Not including me, there are ten others. We went to the high school here. It was on top of a hill. There used to be more of us, but... Yeah... Connie: People die. It's part of life. (They arrive and climb up the hill) Elliot: Welcome to our Hilltop Paradise, The Citadel. I'm Elliot. Connie: Are you the one who's in charge? Elliot: Yeah. We're all kids, except for one. Connie: Why didn't he take charge? Elliot: He didn't want the power. I was the next oldest and I have leadership skills, so, he appointed me as leader. (They enter through the gates) Elliot: There's Estella, sat on top of the wall. She's our lookout this week. Connie: Lookout? Elliot: Sometimes being on top of a hill isn't enough. We need people to keep watch for zombies. (A smaller girl walks over to Connie) Sherry: Who the fuck is this? Connie: Uhh... Sherry: Where did you find her? Was she bit? Elliot: Sherry, we don't know if bites actually kill you. It might just be in movies. Sherry: You sound like Gerald. Connie: Gerald? Sherry: The guy who nearly destroyed his fingers playing that fucking piano. Elliot: Speaking of Gerald, him and a few others are going hunting right about now. Maybe you could help them? Connie: Sure. Might as well make myself useful. (Elliot takes Connie over to Gerald, Kenney, Swarfiga, Von, and Sophia) Elliot: Here's our hunting party. Gerald: Welcome to Sierra Maximum Security Prison. I'll be your Warden. Elliot: For fuck's sake, start taking this seriously or no more dinner. Gerald: Go ahead. (He flexes his arm muscles) I don't eat it anyway. (Elliot leaves) Von: Dickhead. Elliot: I heard that, Paki. Von: Racist asshole. Gerald: Don't listen to him. Karma will bite his gigantic ass one of these days. (Gerald loads his crossbow) Swarfiga: He's so fat he got arrested for carrying ten pounds of CRACK! (Gerald and Sophia start to laugh) Swarfiga: (Swings his axe around) Oh yeah, this is my axe. I call it "Axel." Gerald: Well, I'll own "Axel" after tonight's game of Chess! Swarfiga: No fair! I don't even know how to frickin' play chess! (They go outside the gates and start to kill zombies. Connie uses a bow to kill one of them.) Gerald: Nice work! Could use a better weapon, though! Check this out! (Gerald shoots a zombie with a crossbow) Gerald: Pretty sick, right? My uncle gave it to me! (Sophia takes out two zombies with her fists) Gerald: Nice one, So- (Sophia punches him in the crotch; he falls to the floor in pain) Sophia: Oh shit! I'm sorry, I thought you were... Gerald: Does a spicy boy say "Nice one, Sophia!"? Swarfiga: Aww, poor Gerald. Sucker punched in the dick by a girl. (Gerald sticks his tongue out at him) Kenney: That's enough, guys. Clear out these zombies, find some animals, then we're going to the greenhouse. Connie: What's Elliot's deal, by the way? He seemed alright when he rescued me. Kenney: He's racist and a complete tool. Personally, I voted for Von as leader. Gerald: Who Elliot bullies just for being Indian. Von: Yeah. Kenney: Given half the chance, I'd demote him straight away. Gerald: Vote for Gerald suckas! Sunday is Chess night! Kenney: We don't know when Sunday is. Gerald: It's whenever we wanna play Chess! (They clear out the zombies and then go to the greenhouse, except for Von who returns to the Quad) Kenney: And Gerald, we don't want a repeat of last years corn incident. Connie: Huh? Kenney: Gerald and Swarfiga tried to turn our corn supply into corndogs. (Swarfiga and Gerald laugh) Kenney: Gerald, Swarfiga, you should probably step outside to... calm down. (They do so) Connie: What's his deal? Kenney: Gerald's a complete fucking Kevin. (He laughs) But that's why he's my best friend. Sophia: He also... (She bursts out laughing) Connie: He what? Kenney: There was this piece of shit in our grade called Michael. Used "Jew" and the N word as insults. He picked on Sophia a lot. Gerald has some kinda sixth sense for bullying. He'd run over to Michael and flip the fucker's desk over. Or just go apeshit and leave some nasty scars. Connie: Jesus. What happened to him? Kenney: (Silent) Doesn't matter. What matters is this. Sophia, get some shears. Sophia: What about them? Kenney: Gerald! Swarfiga! You can come in now! (They enter) Gerald: Kenneth Badass-Shaw. Kenney: (Laughs) That your best, Gayrald Warren? Gerald: Fuck, you got me. (Gerald helps Sophia with the crops) Gerald: The Green Thumb has come to assist you. Sophia: Ah, yes. What would I do without the boy who got punched in the balls? Gerald: Shut up. (Sophia laughs. They finish and head back to the Quad with their food) Gerald: My friends! Dinner... is served! Crappy Doctor: Good, maybe we won't starve. Gerald: Nah, you can just use 100% of your power to keep us alive another seven years. Crappy Doctor: Actually, the only time I used 100% of my power was when I created myself. Gerald: Oh, shit. (Gerald gives him the bucket of food) Elliot: About time. I'm fuckin' starving. Gerald: Mmhmm. (Connie sits down next to Gerald, Gabriel, and Sophia as they eat) Gabriel: Is it true you punched Gerald in the balls? Sophia: Yep. Gabriel: Ha! No kids for you! Gerald: Doesn't take a fist to the balls for me to not have kids. Sophia: So, is it Chess tonight? Gerald: Nope. Cards. Winner gets to ask another person a question. (Gerald winks at her) Sophia: I know what I'm gonna ask. "How does it feel to get punched in the nob?" Gerald: I could barely walk after you punched me! It's not funny! Gabriel: (Laughing) Yeah it is! Connie: So, who's this little guy? Gerald: That's my... brother? Kind of? I've been looking after him since he showed up, but I'm obviously not old enough to be his dad. So I just say he's my little bro. Gabe, say hello to Connie. Gabriel: Yo! Connie: I noticed the graves at the hilltop. Who's buried there? Gerald: ...No one. Some of our friends went missing a couple years ago. Gabriel: James, Sophie, Erin, Kari... Holy shit, how many of us died? Gerald: Too many. Kenney: Well, Von, what's tonight's special? (Von puts a plate of cheese on the table) Connie: Is that...? Von: Hey! You guys want any? Gerald: World's gone to shit. People are eating other. Von's making cheese using powdered milk. And he says I never take things seriously. Gabriel: What's a cheese? Gerald: Cow shit. Sophia: Gerald! Gerald: C'mon, he's not that tool from Blur. Kenney: Gerald! Are you ready for a card game? Gerald: Yeah! Care to join us, Miss Connie? Connie: Sure. (Gerald, Sophia, and Connie sit at the table Kenney, Swarfiga, Elliot, and Estella are sat at.) Kenney: What do you want to play tonight? Gerald: (Smirks at Connie) Truth or Dare. Estella: You don't use cards in Truth or Dare. Gerald: Shut up! Gabe doesn't know that! Connie: How does he not know that? Gerald: He was only four when this shit started. Gabriel: What's going on? Gerald: Nothing. Go play with Luna or something. Gabriel: Luna's mean. Gerald: I know, but it's her or Elliot. Gabriel: Oh, yeah. I'll go play with her. (Everyone else sits down for the game) Gerald: Rules are simple. You all get a stack of cards. We all flip one over. Highest card is asking, lowest is answering. Category:Blog posts